Having done a, one week, on site plastering course being trained by experienced plasterers and working alongside builders already working in the industry. I can now see there is a World of difference between a "Builder" and a "Rogue Builder!"
Actual Builders are far less likely to end up on "Crimewatch" or being chased by a film crew in a car park.
I've have also in the past worked for and also employed awesome builders who were polite, efficient and professional. This song is therefore in no way related to them. That said I have also employed people who...
1) Hid leftover rubble and rubbish under our house
2) Sold us turf that died within a month
3) Walked muddy shoes onto new carpets
4) Woke up babies with passionate but out of tune renditions of "Total eclipse of the heart!"
5) Boxed me into my own parking space.
6) Could talk a glass eye shut.
Even though it hurts my male pride to admit it,there are definitely house and garden jobs I will always need to get a professional in to do. That said there are also loads of house and garden jobs I can do myself to...
1) Save myself money
2) Get some exercise
3) Give myself a healthy dollop of dopamine
4) Get use out of old Marathon Finisher t-shirts
It feels good painting your kids bedroom in shorts with a perished lining an "I ran the 1998 Bog Trotters 10k" t-shirt while singing to the radio.
"Forever's gonna start tonight!"
"Forever's gonna start toni...."
"I'm trying to get Jack to sleep!!!!!!"
"Sorry!"
I hope you enjoy the song.
Love The Middle Class Wrapper
"R U A Builder?"
He’s not VAT registered
But did he fix it?
No! He made it worse
Says he’s a builder
Did he fix it?
Learnt it all on Utube
then made it worse
Driveways and plastering
repointing too
His labourer's are 15
Dave and Stu
Dave’s blind in one eye
Stu’s got gout
My son’s finally gone to sleep
please don’t shout
More Cowboy than builder
Did he fix it
online course in plastering
he’s made it worse
20 years man and boy
Language is quite coarse
Always wears a Stetson
And rides a horse
Started at midday
smelling of booze
Put down some dust sheets
then had a snooze
Tex, Dave and Stu have so much fun
Inappropriate comments about someone’s wife’s bum
That taps on backwards
Is that a mistake?
Where does the rubble go?
It ends up in a lake
How’s he a builder
He’s got his own tool belt
That make you a builder?
Not really no
(Instrumental)
We can
prolong any situation
I’ve just
got to nip out to sign on
Can you
quote it? No
It’ll cost
you, why?
Cos I need a
new van
Oh right
Beware of
rogue builders
Will they
fix it?
Cash in hand
no references
Probably not
Get a proper
builder
Talk to
previous customers
Do some
research
And view
their work
Digging in
the garden
Changing the
bulbs
Impress your
other half
and get the
job done
Can I dig
it? YES
Can I change
it? YES
Can I paint
it? YES
Be the
builder
Be the
builder
You'll do a better job
You’re the
builder
You can fix
Inside and
outside
Back
yourself to fix it
Give it a go
Click below to say hello
Twitter @DadMissions2018
facebook @MiddleClassWrapper
Instagram-mcwrapper2018
James Macdonald Copyright 2018
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